Closure

Good Morning Everyone!  

Congratulations on making it to mid-week!  These days we take all the victories we can.  :)  

Today I wanted to talk a little bit about closure.  In the field of counseling, we sometimes call it "termination."  When counselors and clients - in this case, you and me - have helping relationships, it's important to bring closure to those relationships in healthy ways.  Talking about closure allows people to explore their thoughts and feelings around the ending of a relationship well in advance of that ending.  It's not good to have a quick end to a relationship thus being left holding lots of unresolved feelings of loss.  One of the reasons school dismissal has been so hard - none of us got proper closure!  :(  

The need for closure is not just reserved for counseling relationships.  Right now, teachers, administrators, and school counselors are all trying to find good ways to get closure with their students.  One thing I have learned over the years is that starting the process of closure needs to happen early so that by the time it happens, we are all ready.  When you start to see those paper chain count downs or number count downs of the days remaining in the school year on the whiteboard each morning, it's not because we are ready to hurry you all out of the building.  It's simply a way for us to all begin to prepare for the changes that are to come.  It gives us a physical framework from which to work.  

In my office, I usually start talking to kids about the end of the school year after April break.  We talk about fun plans for the summer, discuss summer resources for needed support, and discuss feelings about what lays ahead - possible new teams and new adventures.  We do this because new adventures, and growing up in general, can both be exciting and scary.  I like to give kids plenty of time to explore these feelings before we make it to the last day of school.  This is good practice in counseling relationships - start the process early so that we can manage it well.  

The nice thing for us is that with the exception of the 8th graders, I'll see you all back at school next year, so it doesn't have to be a permanent ending, just a temporary one!  :)  (For those of you 8th graders reading this, I want you to make sure you know that once you get to high school, you are always welcome at CBMS.  Once a cougar, always a cougar, and we love visitors, so please plan to drop in once in a while to say hi!)

Obviously, we are still "in" school and figuring out new ways of doing things, so I am thinking about how you and I should do closure this year.  One thing I'll be doing is asking questions in my Google Classroom that will help bring closure.  But of course, I'll blog about it too - hence this post.  I also want you to remember that if you see me posting a count down, (16 days remaining) it's not because I don't love ya...it's because I do!  I want us to make sure we prepare the right way for the coming break and the time apart which will now be both a physical and virtual break. 

Some of you who work with counselors outside of school may have noticed that what I do and what they do is just a little bit different.  A school counselor's job tends to be focused on helping you be successful each day that you walk through the school doors.  We might talk a bit about what happens a home, or about the past experiences that have gotten you where you are, but generally we focus on goals, dreams, and solutions to move you forward.  We talk about the importance of school success and how it will support you with long term life goals.  I encourage kids to dream about things that make them feel happiest and make plans that align with their hopes and dreams.  When trying to bring closure at the end of the school year, these are the questions I try to focus on:  

• What do you want to accomplish or do during the summer that will help you feel fulfilled?  
• What are your hopes for the upcoming school year?  
• In what ways do you want to transform yourself between now and then?  
• What positives do you want to continue building upon?  

Since we can't physically be together to talk about these ideas, I would encourage you to dwell on your answers bit.  You can share your thoughts with me in the comments, or via email, if you'd like, and as always, I'm happy to talk to you about your thoughts in a google meet as well.  Just let me know if you'd like to meet and I'll send you a link!  

In the mean-time, I hope you enjoy spending some time thinking about your million dreams!  

Be well, 
Mrs. Hempey